OH yeah!!! I had to come right back hot off the presses! staring at a bunch of hot starlets got the old thought machine running! so heeeeeeeeeeeere we goooo!
ali larter. so hot. you know who you’re gonna get cast as?
the one and only DAGGER!!! now, i know, this probably isn’t the role you thought you’d get, but trust me, this is you. you can totally pull this off!! i know there’s some general interest in the character, so you know now i have to cast cloak for you. you didn’t think you’d get a solo movie, did you? where there’s grimy, dark cloak, your beautiful self is somewhere nearby. so your cloak is…
yes sir! MR. RHAMES himself!! happy with that? now, i could’ve gone with lawrence fishburne. but, seeing as how he was the voice of the silver surfer and morpheus in the matrix, he’s been there, done that. but the dude that’s gonna get a couple hard, pipe hittin niggas to go to town on the holmes here is a surefire lock!! picture this: you, sexy outfit, probably body paint on top of liquid latex for that surefire skintight look, and big ving, in a thick ass, long ass, hooded cape thing. its a hit!!!
now, onto jessica biel……..what? you think i forgot about you? did you think for one ION of a second that i was gonna forget you? did you think that you were not gonna grace the pages of my casting couch? did you think i would pass up the chance to get to post pics of you up? you were mistaken!!
oh no, that’s not gonna happen. that body has GOT to be cast! and the only person i could see you playing……….
MS MARVEL!!!!! my god, you’re perfect! cancel the rest of my calls, appointments, and the year! this is the movie i wanna see! why hasn’t this been done before? simple! no one asked me! you are her! from now on, you’re carol danvers, even in public…….i can see the bilboard now………..